Love crappy movies but are too ashamed to admit it? Are you a big Rob Schneider fan but you're tired of being burned? Not sure if you want to waste your money on the same old movie? That's why you have Joe.
Joe Loves Crappy Movies is by Joseph Dunn. Joe willingly goes to see the very worst that Hollywood has to offer. Whenever a crappy movie comes out Joe will be there to see it, make fun of it, and actually review it. Nothing is safe, and nothing is sacred. From the big budget action disasters to the low brow fart based comedies, to anything starring Martin Lawrence? Joe will tear it apart.
With each entry you'll get not only a comic poking fun at the movie, but also a detailed review. Joe's not educated in film or cinematography or acting, he's just a guy that draws comics and likes movies. So if you're looking for the everyman perspective and a little joke in comic form... you're in the right place.
It's true. Not that Batman and Iron Man are taking over for the most recognizable film critics on the planet, but that those two critics are parting ways with the television program that made them household names. On July 21st Roger Ebert posted this statement
that he was leaving Ebert and Roeper: At the Movies
, a show he'd been working on for over 30 years. Ebert has been off camera for some time now due to a battle with thyroid cancer, though he remained active behind the scenes. In his absence his seat has been filled with a rotating list of noteworthy film critics both traditional (A.O. ScottNew York Times
) and in new media (Harry Knowles from Aint it Cool News
), not to mention figures within the industry such as Kevin Smith
Richard Roeper, who took over after the passing of Gene Siskle's in 1999, became the show's constant. I already liked Roeper before Ebert fell ill, he never backed down and never wavered even in the face of some big shoes to fill and a larger-than-life presence sitting across the isle from him. But with the revolving door guest list Roeper became the reoccurring voice on the show and in that time I began to trust his opinion more and more. Even though he gave Road House a "thumbs down".
Roeper's decision to leave the show is reportedly related to a contract dispute and he hopes to go on and start a new show that carries on the traditions that Siskle and Ebert began so long ago. He'll be fine - this is his girlfriend.
When it was announced that the two would be leaving permanently I couldn't say that I was too surprised. Even though the show had been running for 33 years, once Ebert was side-lined all bets were off. Besides, the eventual replacement of younger studs was inevitable. Not that you need to be beautiful and in your twenties to have a valid opinion, but this is television after all. If it weren't for the Internet, Fug-os wouldn't have anywhere to go to complain about stuff.
While Bruce Wayne and Tony Stark would have totally rocked a review of Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants 2, the honor to do it on TV goes to a couple of Bens. The official replacements announced by Disney are Ben Lyons and Ben Mankiewicz. Both come from Hollywood talent and critic pedigree which is promising if you want someone with the inside track. Only - how is someone that grew up on the otherside of the velvet rope supposed to give an accurate representation of what middle America is going to like? Is House Bunny really good or did your grandpa work with some other insider's baby's mama?
The only experience I've had with either is with Ben Lyons, who I've watched and enjoyed on the E network show The Daily Ten. he seems like a good guy. Very likeable, but also kind of a pushover. Almost like doesn't want to hurt anyone's feelings. That's fine, even I always try and find the good in the bad, but every now and then it's nice to see the killer instinct ignited! I can't see Lyons tearing into the Death Race remake without a plastered grin and droopy eye. I hope he proves me wrong though.
Regardless of who replaces them, I certainly don't think this is the end for either Ebert or Roeper. Roeper has more than established himself as a respected presence in the community, and Ebert will be THE film critic to beat until the day he dies. Despite the fact that he's sickly, aging and potentially out of touch with the next generation of movie fans, Ebert has always been able to remain relevant. A good sense of humor and genuinely loving what you do will take you far in this world. Even without being able to say a word he's still the most influential and trusted voice when it comes to deciding what movie America is going to open their wallets for.
Batman and Iron Man were my first choice for this comic. It just seemed liked the right way to go. They've had the biggest movies of the year, and they're a lot of fun to draw! Looking back though there were some good possibilities I overlooked. It's been a year of really fun characters and I think I'll forever be haunted by the possibilities of Indiana Jones and Kung Fu Panda At the Movies.
I hope you guys don't mind this little departure today. There are a lot of good movies on the horizon but I thought this news story was certainly worth mentioning. I really like the idea of weaving movie news comics in with the reviews. It gives me a chance to speculate out loud and on a larger scale. There's no better way to ruin your expectations for a movie than talking about it at length 6 months before it comes out. God Bless the Internet.
There are 10 days left on the pre-order period for the Gotham Ninjas shirts (For boys and girls!) featured in The Dark Knight comic. I'm so grateful for everyone that's bought one already. If you're on the fence about it, c'mere so I can push you over!
For those of you thirsty for more, I'd like to encourage you to run over to my livejournal or Facebook pages where I've been posting sketches and finished pieces for upcoming projects. Check out this Dr. horrible sketch I did in prep for a review and comic of the movie. See? That's the kind of fun you're missing if you're not checking the blogs.
Thanks for reading, gang.
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Joe – The creator of the strip who has embraced giving crappy movies the chance they deserve. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - The Introduction
Yeo – Yeo is Joe’s wife and often the voice of reason in the strip. Having her act rational allows the rest of the cast to embrace being in a comic strip which primarily involves randomly punching people, interacting with fictional characters and talking about boobs. Yeo is smart, beautiful and way too good for Joe. Don’t tip her off.
First Appearance - Fever Pitch
Irv – Joe’s movie-going sidekick who’s always down for watching Jason Statham crescent moon kick some thug through a plate glass window and getting some drinks before after and during a Vin Diesel movie. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - Ong-Bak: The Thai Warrior
Agent 337 George Jones – A government Agent that took over for Joe after he was bad-mouthing President Bush in the V for Vendetta strip. George ran the show for over a month bring a much needed sense of patriotism and justice to both the strips and reviews. He eventually got too attached to his work, empathizing with Joe’s plight to give crappy movies a fair shake. In a way he came to love crappy movies as well and was pushed out of the position. He spiraled out of control and ended up in prison. His adventures will be told in the limited series JLCM Presents: 337 Locked Up which is set to début Christmas of 09.
First Appearance - V for Vendetta
Other Notable Appearances: Stay Alive, Ice age 2, Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector, Slither, Here Comes Guest week, Let’s Go To Prison
Leonidas – The former king of Sparta who has traveled into the future and is having trouble coping with the modern times. Yelling loudly and kicking people into giant holes doesn’t really work the same way it did in the olden days. As time as gone by he’s adjusted but it’s a safe bet that he’s always one bad message away from throwing a spear through someone.
First Appearance - 300
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Strip# 300, The Golden Compass, Rambo, Untraceable, The Ladies of Max Paybe
Palpatine – Former Senator, Emperor of the Galactic Empire, Sith Lord... He shows up in the Joe Loves Crappy movies galaxy on occasion to let people know that they’re being stupid. No one’s really sure how he shows up in this universe but chances are it breaks all kinds of copywrite laws.
First Appearance - Episode III: The Dark Side
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Night Watch, Saw 3, Are We Done Yet
Slow Billy – Billy is a sweet kid but he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed. If you’re watching him for the day be prepared to explain to him the plot of the movie or how popcorn works or, not so much where babies come from, but what babies are. He’s a complete moron.
First Appearance - Four Brothers
Other Notable Appearances: The Chronicles of Narnia, The Da Vinci Code, Vantage Point, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Kyle the Movie Snob – Be careful what fun facts about movies you tell your friends at a friendly gathering or in line for the latest blockbuster, because if you’re even slightly wrong, Kyle will be more than happy to let you know. He usually gets what’s coming to him though. Poor guy has cracked three ribs since joining the JLCM cast.
First Appearance - Ultraviolet
Other Notable Appearances: 16 Blocks, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End, Transformers, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Jean-Luc Picard – Another lawsuit waiting to happen is Jean Luc Picard who, towards the end of the strip’s first year, became the go-to background character. If there was ever a seat to fill or a random person to place wandering around in the background, nine times out of ten it was Picard. While Picard has crossed paths with Irv he and Joe have never met. Perhaps they will some day but for now just can an eye on the background.
First Appearance - The Producers
Other Notable Appearances: I’m not telling you, that’s no fun. It’ like Where’s Waldo – go find him!
Ice Cream Sandwich – Delicious and… deadly? Usually when you see someone eating an Ice Cream sandwich, someone else is experiencing a substantial amount of pain. Still, how nice is an ice cream sandwich on a hot summer day?
First Appearance - Saw IV
Other Notable Appearances: Bee Movie, Run Fatboy Run, Saw V