Released: 10/21/05

Viewed: 11:59pm 10/20/05

Starring: The Rock, Karl Urban,

Directed by: Adrzej Bartkowiak

Not what I expected. Don't read on if you want to enjoy this movie. Seriously. I won't use spoilers, but I may use the word "awesome" too much. Well, probably not.

Video game movies haven't been the best over the years. Alone in the Dark, House of the dead, the Resident Evil franchise, ? the list goes on. Now, even though I was quite fond of the original Resident Evil movie (fresh twist, solid action, terrifying in the theater. It was like an instant shot of adrenalin), Doom may be a better movie. That may mean very little to many people, but you have to appreciate when a group of people take essentially nothing and make something. They clearly had a lot of fun with what they were given to work with.

Story starts off pretty basically. Research facility and monsters ? send in the marines. We're quickly introduced to 8 guys that are doomed to be killed if only because they have the lamest code names you could think of. Guys, there are tons of G.I.Joe names that, if you took, no one would know. I swear. Dibs on Sergeant Slaughter. "This ones for Duke!"

The story does become complicated. They switch scenery pretty quickly. All hell breaks loose. They find that big F'in gun. All great things, and through it all the pacing never slows. There are times where they're explaining things where it comes a little close to boring, and the second the female doctor is introduced everyone forgets how to act for 10 minutes. Ah the effects of a beautiful woman. But they recover.

They do mess with you a lot. You wait a while for the monsters to be revealed fully, even when they're slapping people around from the air ducts, its just giant claws lifting and throwing. You're introduced to rooms and devices that will later be used in some cool way to kill something. And that's cool. It all works really well.

For me there was a very clear high point of the movie, which I'll mention briefly and be dancing around because to spoil something that great would be horrible. Basically, don't expect anything. People take on characteristics and seem very one dimensional, but as the movie goes on morality issues arise and where they go with that is brave. Seriously, whosever decision it was has some big ass balls.

For The Rock, this shows that he really knows what movies to pick. This is a larger than life crowd pleaser that doesn't stereotype him into ANY role at all. I admit I was worried. I said that this would not be the Terminator blockbuster franchise his career really needs. And it won't, but man oh man it is so Predator.

Ok, it's not the Predator either and I'll tell you why: because of the monsters. They were way too generic. They looked good, fantastic work with make-up and puppetry, not to mention the lighting team that hid them in the shadows making them even scarier. But let's face it; they were no Aliens, no Predators. Those guys are icons of horror. They'll be remembered forever. They were the stars of their movies, and the Rock is the star of this one.

Action was great. Mostly shooting, but a couple of crazy fights where the monsters were just tossing guys around. Fun stuff that really got the crowd going. A lot of people will say sarcastically "Hey, I guess the Rock learned that move in WWF." Screw off. I don't care if he learned it in a Girl Scout troop that fight was awesome. People need to drop all the whining that he was a wrestler. The guy can move, the guy is funny, the guy is badass, and he's a lot of fun to watch. The End.

I have one problem with the movie visually. It's very dark. Like, they're in the sewer for a while. And they all have these flashlights attached to their guns. So they go into a dark room and sweep the guns/flashlights back and forth. Every time the flashlight hits the camera it's blinding. Not because it's so bright, but because against a black background it's bright enough. And they do it? a LOT. It's just one little thing I found bothersome.

Ok, the first person nonsense. I made you wait for it, because they made me wait for it! It's the sort of thing where, you know it's coming and you're just waiting for it to pop up. When it does I was like Quagmire at sleep away camp. That gun pops up to get reloaded and I go "GIGGIDYGIGGIDYGIGGIDY!" And I didn't even play this game! It's just cool.

It lasts about 5 minutes and is filled (based on crowd reaction) with reenactments from the game. If you're going to complain that they were ripping the game off, let me introduce you to the concept of an "homage". In that time, a lot happens. Just when it starts to drag a little something else new and cool goes down. Is it gimmick? Sure. But it's effective as hell and I was smiling that entire time.

Stripped down, this is a summer style popcorn flick that if you see with a good crowd, could be hugely entertaining. Turn your brain down from 11 to 5 and you'll have a blast. 7 out of 10 Good solid, clear action and a believable plot that was neither too complicated or lame. Gains points for a gutsy decision on how the characters develop. It was a brave choice that you really have to give them credit for. I wish I could quote the line. You'll know it when you hear it. .

DVD worthy?: Maybe. I feel like a lot of the beginning was an exercise in patience. It's very effective in building tension, but a second time around that might just play as slow. I want action, Pee Wee!

If you liked this movie check out: Resident Evil

Video game, crazy zombies, a more complex story and better in the horror department but people loathe that movie. If you did then I'm willing to bet you'd feel the same way about Doom. Try looking at each as if they weren't based on a summer of your life locked in front of a TV desperately searching for med packs and ammo.

Trailer Hitch: Slither

Where the hell did this come from? Screw The Fog, I'm not afraid of that. But I'm definitely terrified of a dozen worms the size of my foot crawling up the wall so they can climb inside me and make me attack the captain from Serenity. Seriously, this looks like a top-notch horror comedy, sort of like Eight Legged Freaks, except good. For a second I thought it was Snakes on a Plane and I almost did a little jig.

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One quick non-Doom related thing I wanted to mention. Next week I will be doing three strips (Monday, Wednesday, and Friday) over at The Kenmore. I'll be doing the art but my good friend Eri is helping me out with the jokes. We're both huge fans of the strip, and I'm real excited about what Eri and I are putting together, I'll be sure to warn you about it next week when they go up. If you're in the clicking mood right now, check out the guest strip I did for Niego earlier this week!