Love crappy movies but are too ashamed to admit it? Are you a big Rob Schneider fan but you're tired of being burned? Not sure if you want to waste your money on the same old movie? That's why you have Joe.
Joe Loves Crappy Movies is by Joseph Dunn. Joe willingly goes to see the very worst that Hollywood has to offer. Whenever a crappy movie comes out Joe will be there to see it, make fun of it, and actually review it. Nothing is safe, and nothing is sacred. From the big budget action disasters to the low brow fart based comedies, to anything starring Martin Lawrence? Joe will tear it apart.
With each entry you'll get not only a comic poking fun at the movie, but also a detailed review. Joe's not educated in film or cinematography or acting, he's just a guy that draws comics and likes movies. So if you're looking for the everyman perspective and a little joke in comic form... you're in the right place.
This weird love triangle news is for real. I heard about it over on the BigFanboy Livecast. Click the February 24th show to download and listen to the Ioan Gruffud interview where the information is revealed.
Ever since starting our own Pimpcast to discuss our strips every week, as well as the movie themed show, The Triple Feature, that I do every Monday with Tom and Gordon, I’ve really become fond of hunting down and listening to different Podcasts. I found Bigfanboy a couple of weeks ago and absolutely love the casual and topical geek talk about everything I’m already geeking out over. From comics to TV to movies, even to comic industry talk between professionals, they seem to fill up their 2 to 3 hours of airtime with genuinely interesting conversation that helps my work day go by a lot faster.
When I heard the news about the love triangle I immediately thought of the Surfer I knew as a kid. The character been depicted in the past with a set of silver tighty-whiteys that could conceivably be hiding some silver space junk, but when I was reading his books in the early 90’s there was no waste band to be found. He was a space Eunuch. But it didn’t matter because no one ever thought of him trying to get busy with the Invisible Woman, though I do remember a few conversations on how he might dispose of his cosmic waste.
I’m not sure why they changed him, maybe underwear was even less popular than I thought in the 90’s, but he was still a pretty cool character. Or as cool as a stark naked hairless alien riding a surfboard could be. The Fantastic Four 2 version of the Surfer seems to be panty-less and I’m cool with that. It’s better that we don’t know how alien sex works anyway.
When I heard the Surfer would be showing up in the Fantastic Four sequel I was excited but skeptical. The first movie was such a let down. I’ve got the comics and guest comics to prove it, but as much as I go back and forth over the good and bad of my favorite team’s first appearance on the big screen, it’s important to hold out hope.
Then this past holiday, Night at the Museum came out with the FF2 teaser attached to it, and collectively nerds had a sigh of relief and finally felt comfortable enough to get excited about this movie. (Scroll down on the Night review to see my first reactions to the teaser trailer). I was completely blown away by the Human Tourch/Surfer chase scene and couldn’t comfortably focus on Night at the Museum for at least 15 minutes into the film. I walked out of the theater thinking about the previews and not the movie. That’s pretty rare even if the movie sucks.
In the past few months, posters of the Surfer have popped up around the city and have just added on to my anticipation. But are the core four taking a back seat to this showstopper? I’m afraid that it’s going to end up being a movie about the Surfer with the Fantastic Four acting as his back drop. If they can do the balance then I’ll be over the moon. If they can’t… well at least it won’t be the first time they screwed up a Fantastic Four movie.
It could be worse. The Surfer could be seduced by The Thing instead of Invisible Woman.
Follow this link to the official site of Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer and while you’re there feel free to check out one of the best comic book teaser trailers ever. Don’t forget to listen to the two shows I participate in, the Digitalpimp Pimpcast every Thursday at 10pm EST and The Triple Feature every Monday at 10pm EST. And if that’s not enough radio nerd speak for you I highly suggest the BigFanboy Livecast brought to you by BigFanboy.com.
That’s it for now but I’ve the got the comic and review set for Wild Hogs. It’s one of those movies that people expect to suck so the joke for the comic sort of wrote itself, but you might be surprised by what I’ve got to say in my review…
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Joe – The creator of the strip who has embraced giving crappy movies the chance they deserve. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - The Introduction
Yeo – Yeo is Joe’s wife and often the voice of reason in the strip. Having her act rational allows the rest of the cast to embrace being in a comic strip which primarily involves randomly punching people, interacting with fictional characters and talking about boobs. Yeo is smart, beautiful and way too good for Joe. Don’t tip her off.
First Appearance - Fever Pitch
Irv – Joe’s movie-going sidekick who’s always down for watching Jason Statham crescent moon kick some thug through a plate glass window and getting some drinks before after and during a Vin Diesel movie. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - Ong-Bak: The Thai Warrior
Agent 337 George Jones – A government Agent that took over for Joe after he was bad-mouthing President Bush in the V for Vendetta strip. George ran the show for over a month bring a much needed sense of patriotism and justice to both the strips and reviews. He eventually got too attached to his work, empathizing with Joe’s plight to give crappy movies a fair shake. In a way he came to love crappy movies as well and was pushed out of the position. He spiraled out of control and ended up in prison. His adventures will be told in the limited series JLCM Presents: 337 Locked Up which is set to début Christmas of 09.
First Appearance - V for Vendetta
Other Notable Appearances: Stay Alive, Ice age 2, Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector, Slither, Here Comes Guest week, Let’s Go To Prison
Leonidas – The former king of Sparta who has traveled into the future and is having trouble coping with the modern times. Yelling loudly and kicking people into giant holes doesn’t really work the same way it did in the olden days. As time as gone by he’s adjusted but it’s a safe bet that he’s always one bad message away from throwing a spear through someone.
First Appearance - 300
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Strip# 300, The Golden Compass, Rambo, Untraceable, The Ladies of Max Paybe
Palpatine – Former Senator, Emperor of the Galactic Empire, Sith Lord... He shows up in the Joe Loves Crappy movies galaxy on occasion to let people know that they’re being stupid. No one’s really sure how he shows up in this universe but chances are it breaks all kinds of copywrite laws.
First Appearance - Episode III: The Dark Side
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Night Watch, Saw 3, Are We Done Yet
Slow Billy – Billy is a sweet kid but he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed. If you’re watching him for the day be prepared to explain to him the plot of the movie or how popcorn works or, not so much where babies come from, but what babies are. He’s a complete moron.
First Appearance - Four Brothers
Other Notable Appearances: The Chronicles of Narnia, The Da Vinci Code, Vantage Point, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Kyle the Movie Snob – Be careful what fun facts about movies you tell your friends at a friendly gathering or in line for the latest blockbuster, because if you’re even slightly wrong, Kyle will be more than happy to let you know. He usually gets what’s coming to him though. Poor guy has cracked three ribs since joining the JLCM cast.
First Appearance - Ultraviolet
Other Notable Appearances: 16 Blocks, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End, Transformers, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Jean-Luc Picard – Another lawsuit waiting to happen is Jean Luc Picard who, towards the end of the strip’s first year, became the go-to background character. If there was ever a seat to fill or a random person to place wandering around in the background, nine times out of ten it was Picard. While Picard has crossed paths with Irv he and Joe have never met. Perhaps they will some day but for now just can an eye on the background.
First Appearance - The Producers
Other Notable Appearances: I’m not telling you, that’s no fun. It’ like Where’s Waldo – go find him!
Ice Cream Sandwich – Delicious and… deadly? Usually when you see someone eating an Ice Cream sandwich, someone else is experiencing a substantial amount of pain. Still, how nice is an ice cream sandwich on a hot summer day?
First Appearance - Saw IV
Other Notable Appearances: Bee Movie, Run Fatboy Run, Saw V